Chapter 7: Anticipation
I couldn’t tell him.
That loving a short-lived human meant severing ties with my kin.
That my love for him meant being shunned by the First Tree and its guardians.
I couldn’t tell him what it meant.
Because, with his kind heart, always putting me first…
He would surely sacrifice his own feelings.
“I greet the heralds of the First Tree.”
They came at dawn, before the sun rose, silently surrounding me, demanding the rite of severance.
I’d seen it once before—someone who chose to leave the forest for love with a short-lived human.
Having decided to break from the forest’s laws…
I had to sever all ties proving I was one of them.
I removed my robe, folding it carefully.
Though a part of me felt heavy at the thought of parting with the robe that had been with me since childhood, I had already made my choice.
…His kindness over the past year was far sweeter.
The robe had been with me in joy and sorrow…
But even in just a year, the word “elf,” a member of the forest kin, had bound and tormented me countless times.
I reflected again on the fact that Evan had never disappointed me in our year and a half together.
When so many raised their noses and harassed me, he sat by my side so carefully.
While others disrupted my life with noise, he brought peace and calm.
Even when I poured out my frustrations and exhaustion to him…
Evan didn’t grow stern or snap coldly.
Others all demanded I accept their feelings…
And when I asked them to listen to my troubles, they’d lash out, but he was different.
He sat quietly, listening, and when I said I disliked something, he smiled and helped me deal with it.
After I told him I liked peaches, he never forgot and always carried them with him.
When I realized peaches were always with him, my heart tingled so much I collapsed behind a window.
Recalling that feeling, I handed the robe to the figure before me.
As it left my hands, I felt myself becoming even more alone.
Among the forest kin, I was surely an oddity.
With golden eyes that seemed to blaze, I was always noticed.
Though I couldn’t fully feel it myself, receiving so many advances made me realize I must be somewhat beautiful.
I didn’t think that was a good thing.
It didn’t take long to realize that my kin’s attention was filled with vile desires, jealousy, and disgust.
Even when I told him it was mere teasing, I wanted to say it wasn’t.
So I worried if I was placing too great a burden on him.
Could he truly accept me when even my kin couldn’t?
Those worries created yet another knot in my heart.
When I realized he could gently embrace even that knot…
Despite being a frail human compared to the long-lived beings of this world…
When I saw he could boldly give up his long-held priesthood for love…
I became grateful for my beauty for the first time.
For the first time, I felt happiness in everything about me that had captivated such a wonderful person.
“Do you have no regrets about your choice?”
“None.”
Feeling the blade touch my left ear, I slowly closed my eyes.
The thought that I’d no longer be plagued by my “kin”…
The thought that they’d have no room to interfere with my decisions and love calmed my heart.
But that calm wavered.
“Thea, Thea!!”
Because of his voice calling from behind me.
And because of the dizzying pain that followed.
It hurt. Far more than I expected.
I thought I’d steeled myself.
Of course, having living flesh cut would hurt, but still…!
“Who are you to do this to Thea—”
“Ah, the short-lived one. We’ve heard of you.”
Why was he standing here?
He should still be asleep.
My head felt muffled as I struggled to process the voices around me, clutching my ear.
“Heavens, ugh, ngh—”
The warm, sticky blood on my hand.
The familiar yet unsettling sensation made me grit my teeth, trying to pray again, but the words wouldn’t come.
Evan was the one who covered my ear instead.
“Almighty One in the heavens, please hear my voice and heal this poor soul’s wound…!”
With a faint flash from my covered ear, the bleeding stopped, and my blurred vision slowly cleared.
Held in his arms, I saw his face consumed with anger.
I’d seen him frown when listening to my complaints before…
But this was the first time I saw such a flushed face, fiercely glaring at the three before me.
My heart raced at his intense emotion, and feeling so drawn to him couldn’t be wrong.
“…Aren’t you supposed to pray without emotion?”
His voice, having healed my ear, was filled with anger.
“Disqualified as a priest… heh.”
Even my attempt to lighten his mood with a joke didn’t ease his expression, and I might have trembled a little.
“This isn’t the time for such talk.”
“Thea, I need an explanation of what’s happening.”
Watching them leave silently with my robe, he glared fiercely, then looked at me sadly and spoke.
“…Is this related to what the director was talking about?”
As expected, he tries to remember everything about me.
He cares about the smallest details, genuinely thinking of me.
Falling in love with such a person couldn’t feel unnatural.
In the short moment compared to my lifetime…
A fleeting glimmer, brief enough to call an instant.
Falling for a man named Evan, who shapes that glimmer beautifully, isn’t that only natural?
“My ear… it won’t grow back, will it?”
Feeling his gentle touch on the blunt edge, I took a sip of the tea he handed me.
Brewed from leaves with mild pain-relieving effects.
As the bitter taste spread, the phantom pain in my ear seemed to lessen.
This is why healing miracles aren’t used on severed wounds, but…
“It’s a mark. You don’t need to worry about it.”
An elf with a severed ear is no longer protected by the forest’s rules.
It also proves there’s no need to follow those rules.
It was a necessary wound for me.
Rules that didn’t protect me from such harsh treatment were never needed.
How could I feel safe under my kin’s rules in a place where they tormented me?
Evan, whom I met here, was my only refuge, the only one who could comfort me.
I belonged with him more.
It was becoming clearer that Evan was the human who fit me perfectly.
“It must hurt.”
“It’s okay thanks to you. I was a bit startled seeing you rush over in a panic.”
“I was going to show you my ear and explain when you woke up later this morning, but since you saw, there’s no helping it.”
Perhaps because of the tea, I leaned my slightly heavy body against his shoulder.
Feeling his firm, reliable warmth enveloping me, I set the cup on the table.
“Living with a short-lived human… actually causes a lot of problems.”
“According to the forest’s laws, we must live ascetically.”
“So, interacting with emotional short-lived humans tends to shake us up.”
“Coming out of the forest like this is part of a test.”
“A test to see if you’re confident you won’t be swayed by the outside world.”
“Then I’ve become a disturbance to you…”
Stroking his face with its drooping eyes, I couldn’t stop a smile from spreading.
I hope I didn’t look strange in his eyes.
“You said it yourself, didn’t you? That you’re grateful for straying from the path of a priest serving God’s word?”
“That you’d find God’s word in a life with me.”
“I did… didn’t I?”
“Your words guided me… I want to say.”
“You telling me there are many ways to serve God gave me courage.”
“Courage to love you.”
“But surely, if it weren’t for me—”
“Then I’d have lived without knowing happiness, surrounded by shameless people drawn only to my appearance, surely.”
In that fleeting moment, he gave me peace.
A time more serene and sweet than any other.
If I could be with him, how much longer could this time stretch?
The test is useless to me now.
Any affection for my kin vanished long ago.
He said he’d give up the priesthood for our time together.
Yet he feels such guilt over my choice, embracing me so fiercely…
How much will he cherish me going forward?